I wish I only lived at night.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Randomize
