i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Randomize
