I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize