OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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