My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
