So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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