Whod you bang
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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