Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
God, you're like boner-b-gone
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
They are going to name an STD after you.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
