I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
