we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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