Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize