You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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