Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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