there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
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