I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
