in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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