Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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