oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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