yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
