I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize