I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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