the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
