Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
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I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
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We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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