but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
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I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
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He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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