Whod you bang
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
