You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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