i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Randomize