I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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