piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
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