I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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