And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?