and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
