new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I have post one night stand depression
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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