Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
