What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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