jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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