Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.