Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
