Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
