omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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