I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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