I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
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I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
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He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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