just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize