she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
