whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
