we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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