There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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