If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
