he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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