HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize