I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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